Sitting on the porch at dusk. Neon blue bug zapper buzzing overhead. Take a bite, smile, shake the bottle vigorously over the extra large slice of pizza [topped with extra mozzarella cheese dripping from the sides—no doubt] and continue smiling. Crickets, birds, owls, and evening wildlife—nature; the only sounds heard. Continue eating pizza with an enormous smile, kick over the empty bottle on the porch floor [a stash of empty bottles]. A sound in the distance getting closer, closer, eyes follow sound of buzzing. Camera zooms in. Annoying critter lands on leg. Continue eating pizza, smile as the mosquito bites leg. Mosquito flies away. In flight as the mosquito flies away, it resembles the Death Star exploding in space. Smile and take another bite of pizza. Camera zooms in on Tabasco sauce. Unstoppable laughter ensues.
Not a lot of people remember Super Bowl XXXII, January 25, 1998, or in non-Roman numerology Super Bowl thirty-two. The game was staged at Qualcomm Stadium in San Francisco California. Quarterback John Elway and Pro Bowl running back Terrell Davis led the Denver Broncos, coming off a 16-4 regular season schedule. The 13-3 Green Bay Packers inhabited the opposite side of the field. Bret Favre and wide receiver Antonio Freeman connected on an unprecedented 81 catches, 1,243 yards and 12 touchdowns over the regular season. After the fact [soon after], armchair coaches contended It was a somewhat of a predictable disappointment of a game, however it was uncharacteristic for Brett Favre and the Green Bay Packers as they were defeated in a 31-24 upset. Being a lifelong Chicago Bears fan I quite enjoyed the Packers loss.
The ultra-hyped half-time show was non-memorable to say the least, it was dry and the lip-synching coordinators must have been watching the commercials, as was the rest of the world. The most memorable aspect of Super Bowl XXXII was undoubtedly the Tabasco commercial, which still receives uncontrollable laughs and raves to this very day. I recall falling off the chair in laughter.
Annoying disease carrying mosquitoes deserve death and destruction. It seems they tend to get worse with each passing year. Spray the yard, drench yourself in Off, and try handed down home remedies and they all end up with you scratching mosquito bites and slapping the crap out of yourself. In short, there is just no getting away from these buggers. Therefore, when we see a happy-go-lucky normal Joe sitting on his porch annihilating mosquitoes in grotesque fashion a victory is won for all humankind.
One day my grandchildren’s grandchildren may not know who John Elway, Terrell Davis, Antonio Freeman, or Bret Favre was, but thanks to YouTube and Tabasco, they will probably feel the victory of an exploding mosquito.